Today Is a Day for "No"

Today is a day for "no."

I met with the District Committee on Ordained Ministry this morning, assuming that it would end with me being recommended to the Western North Carolina Conference for commissioning in 2012. That did not happen. The meeting wasn't what I was expecting, and it quickly became clear that I was not prepared and am not ready to be commissioned this year. This wasn't a huge surprise, but it was certainly humbling, because I am rarely told "no." In the end, though, I agree that I am not ready, and now I don't have to meet a January deadline for commissioning papers. It was freeing.

I followed up that humbling experience by giving a "no" of my own. I had been invited to lead worship for a church work camp over Christmas break; it sounded like a great opportunity, but after this semester, I am going to need a break, and I don't spend enough time at home (and even less time actually being present at home). I often feel like I have to take any cool opportunity, either out of pride or a desire to prove myself or simply because I say "yes" to everything, but today I emailed the camp organizer and told her it would be better for me if I did not commit to doing it. It was freeing.

In general, I think a posture of "yes" is a good one to have. However, in order to own and commit to every "yes" I give, I must be able to say "no" when necessary; and if I am ever to appreciate a "yes" given to me, I need to be told "no" from time to time.

(In case anyone is concerned about my future, not to worry. I'm continuing as a certified candidate and have been affirmed in my call to ministry and encouraged to do commissioning next year, so this isn't a forever "no.")